The value in questions...

She said she didn't think she could believe in God anymore. How could she? It makes perfect sense. He was 19. Young and beautiful. Ripped from the world almost within a blink of an eye.

But does it really have anything to do with the powers that be? Oh, I have my doubts, my issues, my beliefs. This was not the time.

She needed something else. Something I tried desperately to provide. I am a poor substitute for my mother.

I walked through the Vatican. I didn't have a holy experience. I gaped at the grandeur, the beauty and thought about the irony in Michaelangelo's bitterness. I actually felt closer to my grandmother than I did to God.

If the events of the last week and a bit have taught me anything it is that we only live once. Death is inevitable and in the end the moment is what matters. Sort of....

Carry me away. I need your strength to get me through this. Slowly walk away, To breathe again....